My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; and in Your book were all written the days that were ordained for me, when as yet there was not one of them. Psalm 139:15-16
Do you ever wish you could sneak a peek at God’s book? All of our days were written in it. Imagine that. Before we were even born, He knew every encounter we’d have, every broken heart, every smile, and every tear. He knew when we’d seek Him, and when we’d wander.
Do you get impatient to know what’s next, like I do? Lately I’ve been feeling like I’m on hold, just waiting for something to happen, and I grow impatient. I want things settled. I want to know what my life is going to look like a year from now, and five years from now. I don’t think I’m the only one.
We’re used to things happening quickly. We live in a time of microwave meals and high-speed internet. Instant gratification. We want to see the finished product now.
We want to see the finished puzzle, not the scattered pieces strewn across the table. We’re so impatient to get the pieces together, to bring an end to the seemingly chaotic mess in front of us. I’m reminded of when I was a child, and I would try to force a puzzle piece to fit into a spot I was convinced the piece must go. It only makes sense that the blue piece would fit with the other blue pieces, doesn’t it? Surely it must fit! Ah, but forcing pieces to go where they were never meant to go just doesn’t work. It offers a temporary solution, but ultimately throws the whole puzzle off. Sometimes it feels like we’re trying to put this puzzle together without even having the benefit of a box lid to guide us.
We want to see the finished tapestry, not the tangle of knots and threads that we see on the underside. The tapestry, a beautiful blend of light and dark threads skillfully woven together to create a stunning piece of art, greatly multiplying the effect of the individual colors. Certainly there are some colors I would never choose, and the placement doesn’t always seem to make sense, yet in those times when we are given just a glimpse of the beauty on the other side, we see how every color is necessary in order to create something of infinite more beauty than we could have thought up ourselves. And those knots? They are every bit as important, as they signal the start and finish of a new vision, a new work.
For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so that we would walk in them. Ephesians 2:10
Our lives are not just random moments and seasons strung together over a lifetime, and thankfully, we’re not left here to figure it out alone.
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. Psalm 119:105
We have the Bible, the Word of God. We also have a Helper, if we belong to Jesus.
But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you. John 14:26
It’s a pretty good deal, isn’t it? We give Jesus our mistakes, intentional and unintentional, and He forgives us and gives us a new beginning. We give Him our broken and disenchanted hearts, and He heals us and gives us a new heart. We give Him our jobs, our finances, our families, our thoughts…everything that makes us US, and He transforms them into something useful for His purposes. An upgrade for sure, though sometimes the process looks more like scattered pieces of a puzzle or tangled threads in a tapestry.
So why do we grow impatient with the process, or follow reluctantly?
Maybe we don’t really believe that God is as good as we’ve heard He is – as good as we want Him to be.
“Yet you say, ‘The way of the Lord is not right.’ Hear now, O house of Israel! Is My way not right? Is it not your ways that are not right?” Ezekiel 18:25
When I fail to trust Him, aren’t I saying the same thing?
Maybe we think He’ll withhold good from us.
For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows grace and favor and honor; no good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly. Psalm 84:11
Everything we have, EVERYTHING, is a gift from Him. From the air we breathe to the lungs in our body, from the colors of the sunrise and sunset to the eyes He has given us to see them. Everything we see, touch, hear, taste and smell is a gift, along with the ability to experience and enjoy those things.
Maybe we think we can do a better job of molding us than He can.
Will the clay say to the potter, ‘What are you doing?’ Or the thing you are making say, ‘He has no hands’? Isaiah 45:9
But who are you, O man, to talk back to God? Shall what is formed say to Him who formed it, “Why have you made me like this?” Romans 9:20
I know I have felt that at times, wondering why some areas, whether in personality, mental aptitude, interests or physical body, seemed to be lacking or overabundant. It is a true statement that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. The very areas that I saw as too little or too much are the very things that have drawn those who are closest and dearest to me. But even if that weren’t the case, HE is pleased with His work, and ultimately that is all that matters.
Maybe we feel alone, and don’t really believe that He cares and is with us.
You have enclosed me behind and before, and laid Your hand upon me. Psalm 139:5
And yet, the Lord keeps pursuing us. He doesn’t give up on us. He knows our struggles and He knows our victories, and He wants us to know that He is with us. We are not alone, no matter how it feels or what it looks like.
O Lord, You have searched me and known me. You know when I sit down and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar. You scrutinize my path and my lying down, and are intimately acquainted with all my ways. Even before there is a word on my tongue, behold, O Lord, You know it all. Psalm 139:1-4
If I settle myself long enough to really talk to the Lord about my circumstances, invariably He wins my heart over, and I concede that His ways are higher than my ways, and His thoughts are higher than my thoughts. He is good, and kind, and loving, and wants His very best for me. I find that the waiting process becomes easier when I think more about who He is than what He’s doing or not doing.
If you are struggling with this today, I pray that you’ll talk to Him about it. Whatever it is, give it to Him, and let Him give you His peace. Another great trade – our anxiousness for His peace.
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7
You are so loved.